TTC and TLAs in OKC

The military has a TLA (three-letter acronym) for everything, it seems. Well so does the infertility world. Yesterday, I went for what is known as an HSG, or hysterosalpingogram (try saying that three times fast; hence TLAs). I was warned by all my other TTC friends that this procedure was going to hurt like the dickens. So I was prepared. I took the ibuprofen that my doctor required, but just in case, I took a Lortab an hour before the procedure. Now, something else I've got to fess up to is having a wee bit of the anxiety about pain. So, I reasoned that the Lortab would conk me out so my anxiety didn't get the best of me during the procedure. And of course, the pain relieving effects of the Lortab couldn't hurt either.

Just before I was led into the radiology suite (lamb to slaughter?) my doc took one look at my conked-out-ness and just chuckled. What he didn't realize is that in a few short minutes he was going to have one stressed out, sniffling patient on his hands. So we go into the suite, I get undressed, and he starts doing what he does: inserting the speculum, swabbing the anesthetic, setting up the catheter, etc. I, of course, am tensing up. And all you ladies know what happens we we're in this situation and we tense up? Finally, the doc's ready, and the x-raying begins. "Lie flat, now roll left, good, now flat again, and roll right. Very good! Beautiful!" You would have thought I was back on the runway in New York. "Hey, are you okay?" Me? Sniffle, sniffle, tears, "yes..." said in a small voice. And just like that, we're done.

Now wait a minute, where was this pain that I was warned about? The crying had begun, yes, in anticipation of it, but it hadn't really hurt at all. And then, BAM!, like a bolt of lightening right through my innards, he pulls out the catheter, and you would have thought I'd been stuck with a cattle prod. That hurt!! Now, I had a miscarriage last fall at 12 weeks, and let me tell you, uterine contractions? No fun. And that's what it felt like all of the sudden. But just as suddenly as the pain came, it was gone. And I had gone to all that trouble with the Lortab and the tears and all. And the outcome? Lovely, clear fallopian tubes, and my uterus in equally as good shape.

One test down. Next one? Post-coital test. I wasn't sure it was possible to take even more of the fun out of baby-making sex.